WIP Sample: My favorite mayor, again

I'm editing the final chapter of the novel I'm working on, the second Grant Starr thriller. I've stated several times in posts that my favorite character is Mayor Mateus Dutra, "Manny".

Grant thinks Manny is dirty, which he is, and suspects he killed a female member of the city council he'd once had an affair with, for reasons unknown. Probably having something to do with the pot deal Manny is trying to push through the city council. Grant collected some of Manny's DNA and his fingerprints the night before, from some bar glasses, and is waiting for the lab to process the evidence. He's sure Manny's DNA will match skin found under the victim's fingernails.

Manny's in a pinch. He doesn't know he's being investigated for murder, he just thinks Grant's on him about taking a bribe, which he hasn't yet done. He's got $300,000 coming Wednesday night, from the pot company, for his part in getting the city council to sign on. But the cops have been all over him... All he's gotta do is make it to Wednesday.

The final chapter takes place on a Monday. Manny has negotiated a little advance on his bribe, which he expects to collect at the bullfight that night. But then Grant is in his face again...

Grant pulled his truck into a parking slot in front of Dutra Insurance Services and shut off the motor. They could see the mayor through the floor-to-ceiling window, and the mayor made a face at them, and said something to his secretary. She glanced out the window at the detectives piling out of the truck, grabbed her purse and exited the front door, holding it open for the detectives.

"What can I do for the cops today?" Mayor Dutra said, trying on his mayor face.

They had decided, in the truck on the way, they wouldn't divulge they were investigating him for the murder of Marina Terra.

Grant said, "I'm glad you didn't leave town, Mayor."

"I ain't got a reason to leave town, and I gotta be at the bullfight tonight anyway. I told you everyone calls me Manny."

"I don't care what everyone calls you, I'm calling you Mayor Dutra."

This brought a glare from the mayor, which he quickly tried to turn into a smile. He and Grant stared at each other until Bensen said, "What time you closing the office today?"

"Why do you wanna know? I don't gotta tell the cops when I'm closin' up."

"In case we need to talk to you again."

The mayor turned his head to face Bensen and said, "Maybe three, maybe four."

"You goin' home after that?" Bensen said.

"I told you I gotta go to the bullfight tonight. I gotta march in the openin' ceremonies."

Grant shifted gears. "Have you spoken to anyone from Allied Valley Growers today?"

The mayor turned back to Grant, his face a dark red. "You know how you kiss a Portagee's ass? The same way you kiss that bitches ass" -- he pointed at Amber -- "you kiss it, but you don't gotta give it no tongue."

Grant popped out of his chair, reached a long arm across the desk and grabbed the mayor's collar and yanked it, lowered his face to the mayor's and said, "You motherfucker..." He made a fist with his free hand and cocked his arm.

Caught off guard, the mayor fell forward onto the desk, grunting and cursing in Portuguese. Bensen and Amber jumped up and grabbed Grant's cocked arm, and Bensen said, "Whoa there Ali. Let's cool this down a tad."

Grant shouted into Dutra's face: "I'm gonna kick your ass, you hear me!"

The mayor, struggling to regain his balance, said, "I'm gonna sue your ass! I told you I ain't gonna talk to you no more without my attorney and now I'm gonna sue your ass!"

Grant shoved Dutra back into his chair, which did not hold his weight and tumbled backward, spilling him onto the floor. Grant shook off Bensen and Amber and pushed his way to Dutra, kicked him in the ribs and bent down and growled, "You pissed off the wrong cop, and you know what? Before this day is done it'll be my pleasure to lock your fat ass up. If I don't kill you first."

Dutra flailed his arms, trying to right himself, looking like a turtle caught on his back, and he shouted, "I'll have your badge and everything you got! I'm gonna--"

"Stuff it," Grant said. "It'll be your word against three cops, and everyone in town knows you're a crook."

"He took a swing at you," Bensen said. "We can haul him in for assaulting a police officer." He moved to stand on the other side of Dutra.

"You fuckers!" Dutra yelled. But he quit thrashing.

"We should haul your ass in," Grant said, "make a spectacle of it. But I'm gonna wait until we got enough on you so they never let you out."

Dutra stared up into Grant's face and said, "You wouldn't be so tough without that badge and gun."

Grant pulled his shield and gun out and set them on Dutra's desk. "You wanna try right now fat man?"

Their eyes remained locked for ten seconds, then Dutra said, "Get outta my office."

Grant said, "We'll be seeing you soon," picked up his things and the detectives filed out of the mayor's office.

Sweating and shaking with fury, Manny rolled out of his chair and used the desk to pull himself up. The blue Ford was backing away from his office, but he could see the tall cop looking back at him. He gave the cop the bird, and the cop made a gun with his index finger and thumb and fired it at Manny.

"Goddamn you!" Manny yelled.

He lurched to the water cooler, drank three cups and doused his face. He knew a guy who could get him a gun on short notice. In fact, he knew a couple of guys. He didn't think the cops had anything on him, he hadn't taken any money yet, but if they did, he'd take that cop down with him. He'd shoot him if the face if it was the last thing he'd do.

 The section still needs a little polishing, but I like it.

Book Review: "Van Raighan's Last Stand" by R.J. Davnall

This review is for episodes one through four of R.J. Davnall’s “The Second Realm” stories, which are contained in the volume titled “Van Raighan’s Last Stand.” It can be found here on Amazon U.S. and here on Amazon U.K.

It’s been many years since I’ve read a fantasy book, but I’ve been trying to expand the genres I read. I ran across Davnall’s blog, enjoyed his writing there, and decided to give his stories a read.

The story is set some seventy years after the “RealmCrash,” where, presumably, the First and Second Realms somehow collided, causing the death of most of Earth’s inhabitants (if indeed the book takes place on Earth). Pre-RealmCrash cities are in ruins but a form of government still exists. Story conflict takes place between inhabitants of each Realm, with those of the Second Realm being more powerful than those of the First.

Davnall plops the reader right down into the story, without a prelude, which I had mixed feelings about at first. It was difficult to follow the plot at times because I didn’t know what terms like “Gift Giver” and “Clearseeing” meant until I’d read most of the first story. Later I decided it was the right thing to do as it allows the plot to flow naturally. You’re fed the back story a little at a time instead of all at once, which shows restraint by the author and good story-telling ability.

The scenes where the Clearseeing is done are fantastic. You’re really taken into the mind of the Clearseer, Rel, and are led to feel what he’s feeling and see what he’s seeing. I really enjoyed the final, forth story; very exciting.

There’s a bit too much text spent inside Rel’s head for my liking, what he’s thinking and feeling, but I’m an action kind of reader: I want something to happen! And he’s a bit too temperamental for me, too, prone to emotional outbursts and pouting.

All-in-all, a superb fantasy story! The ending is a cliffhanger, making me look forward to the next installment. Highly recommended.

Kind Review for THE MIGHTY T

I received a nice review for THE MIGHTY T last week.As I've written before, I appreciate honest reviews from readers I don't know. Actually, I appreciate honest reviews period.

I think both of my novels are good entertainment. I hold no delusions I'll ever win a Pulitzer for them, but I think I give my readers more than their money's worth.

Here's the review in it's entirety:

Okay, I admit it. I actually had a dream about this thriller. The Mighty T by Everett Powers is a well-plotted and written indie book. His characters--stars, average Joes, and dumb asses--are real and given their appropriate due. The dialogue is tight. And Powers keeps upping the ante on the level to which an eco-terrorist will go to get what he wants. While I found the ensemble cast a bit difficult to keep straight at the start, the story and characters straighten out quick enough once Detective Grant Starr starts dominating the page. The story is analogous to a real investigation. It starts with a measure of confusion that ultimately gets clarity. The villain is thought-provokingly delusional and bad to the bone. The secondary villain is a bit more difficult to fathom, but that's okay. She's a throw-back hottie with an edge.

One thing that bugs me about thrillers is the amount of mayhem authors often give away before it's necessary. This story gave some away, but not enough to ruin what happens next or at the end. The last 140 pages flew by - that's great, because I stayed up to two a.m. to finish reading it. I love when that happens. The dénouement, however, dragged a bit. The story was over; the adrenalin rush dissipated; close it out. Some may find the technical information too much to absorb, but I liked it. The environment/economic message was evenly played.

There is a lot to like here, and I'm tempted to read Powers' next book, Canals. Despite some minor flaws, this is a great read for a thriller lover and a really good read for the rest of us. But how did it end up on my Kindle? It's a borderline baby, but any book that makes me dream about it before I'm finished with it gets extra points. The minor flaws keep it from being a total knockout, but it still slides under the wire into the "5" camp of books that deliver and deserve to be read. Well done. Read it.

The reviewers criticisms are fair and not new to me. His/her (Rick? Carrie?) rating of 5 stars is more than generous.

I'd like to ask a favor. Would you please visit my THE MIGHTY T page on Amazon and "like" this review? "Like" any others you, er, like, as well. Thanks.

Here's the link.

Finished first draft of next Grant Starr thriller

No one does the happy dance better than Snoopy!

I finally finished the first draft of my next Grant Starr thriller. I wish I could tell you its title, but I don't know what it is. I began writing this book in April of 2011 and had planned on publishing it in the fall of 2011. Unfortunately, life happened and other things became more important than finishing a novel.

I was tempted to ditch the project for personal reasons, but thought it had merit and deserved to be fleshed out. It weighed in at about 45K words when I set it on the shelf last June and comes in at 131K as a first draft. CANALS ended up at 140K and the THE MIGHTY T at about 100K. I have to admit it was very difficult to complete. I have a great idea for the third Grant Starr thriller, so good it was difficult to ignore its pleas to be written.

This book begins and ends at a "bloodless" Portuguese bullfight, held in a small town about thirty miles from me. They're called bloodless because the bulls aren't killed or hurt, unless you call having to chase a horse or a skinny man dressed funny around the arena being hurt. I've attended two of these bullfights and they're some of the most exciting events I've ever attended.

I wanted to do something a little more challenging this time: I wanted to have two plots that intersected. I don't care to read overly complicated genre books, so I don't write them. As with THE MIGHTY T, the reader will now who done what to whom pretty early in the book. The suspense comes with wondering if they're gonna get away with it, or get caught. I'm not telling!

Hopefully it will be ready for publication in July.

Sample Wednesday: A Hungover Mayor

This is a sample from the novel I'm currently working on, the second Grant Starr thriller. It is yet untitled.

Mayor Dutra, "Manny," one of the bad guys in the book, has become one of my favorite characters. He drinks too much and is crude and crooked: delicious qualifications for a fictional small-town mayor.

I was going to provide a little info to set up the scene, but thought better of it. You should be able to figure out what's going on from the text. The first draft will be done this month and I hope to have it published by June. Enjoy!

(But keep in mind this is in rough draft form and may have the heck edited out of it in rewrites.)

   Manny had trouble getting out of bed Thursday morning; he'd gone drinking again after the council meeting, and he'd tied one on good. He crawled into the shower and let the hot water beat some life into him, then stumbled into the kitchen to get the coffee going.

   When hot coffee began gurgling out of the machine, he switched a mug for the pot and held it there until it was half full, stuck the pot back on the plate and put an ice cube in the mug, pushed the cube around with a spoon and the phone rang.

   He groaned and got the handset off the counter, punched the button and croaked into the mouthpiece, "Yeah?"

   "Mayor Dutra?"

   Manny frowned. "Yeah, who's this?" The accent was familiar, but his alcohol-hammered brain couldn't produce a name or a face.

   "This is Lorne Eames, from Valley Unified Growers. How are you today?"

Eames ... He connected the name with the accent, but the name of the company didn't click. "I had better mornings."

   "I hope that doesn't mean the meeting went poorly last night."

   Ah, that Eames: the pot guy. Manny felt his spirits pick up, and felt as if a little more blood had found its way into his brain. "The council meetin' went just like I said it would."

   "Hmm ... Does that mean it looks good for the vote next week?"

   "I got three votes lined up." Manny took a hit of the coffee. "That's all I need, three."

   "Right, you said all you needed was a simple majority. What are the odds someone might change their mind by next Wednesday?"

   Manny pictured the faces of the three yes votes he had in his pocket; two had been blackmailed, so he was sure of them. Marina had said yes, as he'd thought she would, but because he had nothing on her, he couldn't be absolutely sure of her loyalty. He told Eames: "Zero. You don't got a problem with the money, do you?"

"No, Laken has the funds lined up so we'll have the cash next week."

   "I want it Wednesday night, after the council meetin'. I want it right after the vote."

   "Will the documents be signed at the meeting? We'll need our guarantees before we can release the funds."

Damn. Manny had forgotten about the papers. The papers would require the city attorney, Leonard Caldas, to be involved, and attorneys were never in a hurry to get anything done because they got paid by the hour. He wondered if he could talk to Leonard today, get him primed for next week.

   "Mayor?"

   "I forgot about the damn attorney. I'm gonna take the papers over there today and get him to put a rush on it."

   "We'll be there next Wednesday, Laken and I, with the cash. If you can get the papers signed that night, it's all yours. We're eager to get started."

   "I'll let you know," Manny said, then hung up.

   He had drained his mug and so refilled it, this time adding milk to cool the coffee. At the table, he started thinking about how he could get the attorney Leonard Caldas to do something in a week that he usually took two months to do.